December 17th

Today's weigh in: 189.4lbs.

Up 2.4lbs from last week. Surprised? Nope - I ate like crap last weekend and I got sloppy during the week. Despite doing all my workouts (and having an incredibly poor Yoga workout), still up.

Congrats to my wife though who is down 3.5 lbs. Kudos. Next week hopefully we can both celebrate losses.

December 10th

This morning I weighed in at 187.4 lbs. Down a total of 15 lbs.

Completed my 6th day of P90X.

December 6th - reflection and motivation

Well driving into work this morning I had LOTS of thoughts on how I was going to blog today and what that entry (or entries) would entail. Nothing like a morning full of work to FLUSH that down the toilet. lol Forgive me as I ramble, somethings may not even make sense - but I just try and do a brain dump essentially when I post. The thing that usually holds me back is my typing skills. lol

I was recently asked to share some pictures of the last time I had taken my personal fitness seriously. (I did share). Fortunately I still have those pictures from nearly 9 years ago. At that time I was pretty close to the same situation where I am now. I'm 39 now and getting ready to hit a milestone age of 40. Back then it was right after I turned 30 that I realized - WOW I am frigin FAT! For someone who was always very active when younger, I didn't like that realization. I had allowed myself to get from 150 - 160 lbs all the way up to 215lbs. What a HUGE jump. At that time my girlfriend (and biggest supporter) and I made a commitment to fitness and ourselves. We busted our asses and focused on nutrition and got to arguably the best shape either of us had ever been in.

That woman continues to be my biggest supporter and one of the best things to ever come into my life. I've been fortunate enough to marry that woman and now we have 2 beautiful (troublemaking) children to share with the world. It has been amazing journey with her. However, going through that journey we got off track. We allowed ourselves to get in our own way. We stopped working at it. End result? Fat again. That's really the bottom line. At the end of this past summer (August 2011) we again decided it was time to make our personal fitness a priority. We have made a conscious and consistent effort to do just that. You can say you want to do it for your family, your children, etc... In my opinion - the first person you need to want to do it for is yourself. If you can't be motivated to do something for yourself or WANT to do something for yourself, you aren't going to do it. My motivation came because I did not like being what I had become. A fat, out of shape man who no longer was looked at as attractive. That's what it came down to for me. Not knowing what direction to go, just knowing I needed a change, I started doing Weight Watchers with my girlfriend (now wife) and lost a ton of weight. Later, after I started slipping - I upped the ante when I saw an infomercial for BeachBody Power90. Ordered it and completed the program in that 90 days.

The program was no joke. It sells you an image with a promise that you can obtain that image (or something reasonably close to it) in 90 days if you follow the program. They show you tons of success stories of other "ordinary" people who managed to pull this off. The program works. IF you commit to it. Not just getting up and working out for 15 weeks or whatever it was. But going hardcore and getting your nutrition in line and eating the way you are supposed to. I did it. Well..... at first I just did the workouts =) Then after not seeing the results I wanted to see I went hardcore on the nutrition. I was bigger than I had ever been, stronger than I had ever been, at my optimum weight (around 170lbs) and felt FANTASTIC! On weekends I would do double workouts. I'd wake up, do a strength workout, go for a couple mile run and come home and do a cardio workout. A fitness level I had never been to in my life.

What happened? I reached the end. I did my 90 days. Although I looked and felt significantly better than I ever had, I didn't look like the cover of the program. I didn't have chiseled abs. That really frustrated me. Also, there was no "next stage" to the program. When you completed your 90 days, you were encouraged to do a rest week and then what? There was no P90X or P90X+, or P90X2. Yeah, I could have done Power90 again, but what was the point. In my eyes it had already failed me. I didn't get those abs I was promised and I was pissed!

I then turned my efforts to a different BeachBody product which some Power90 graduates were doing. It was called Slim in Six. I'll be honest, that program was ridiculously hard. I didn't think it would be because it was a woman teaching it (again - honesty here). Debbie whatever her name is kicked my ass. Unfortunately though I didn't see it as a graduation level from Power90. I started to lose the upper body size that I had worked pretty hard to get and from that I started to lose motivation. I kept at it for a little while, but my workouts were very inconsistent and eventually I just stopped. I easily found distractions and let those distractions become the focus of my life. No longer did I make time to workout. I started to eat like crap and it was a very gradual decline. Just like the boiling a frog theory. If you take a frog and put him in room temperature water and then start to slowly increase the water temperature until it comes to a boil, you will kill the frog and the frog won't even realize you are killing him. Well that is

essentially what I was doing to myself. Although I didn't realize it.

Here is where I started/looked like when I first started caring about working out (nearly 9 years ago).

I sadly do not have pictures of when I completed the 90 days. I've looked over and over and over, but can not find anything. It pisses me off, but hey, what doesn't? lol Here is what I do have. My 60 day pics. You can see the transformation and how much progress I had made in just 60 days. 60 DAYS. It goes to show how much a person can accomplish when given the right tools, information and motivation.

Looking back at these pictures I realize how far I had brought myself and I'm really proud of that. At the same time I look at how far I've let myself go and it gets me mad. I can't blame anyone other than myself. I did that to myself. Now, nearly 9 years later I find myself fighting the same uphill battle that I put myself in so long ago. This time with lots of different elements changed in my life. The constant though will be my desire to succeed and get to the fitness level I believe I should be. Not for my incredibly supporting family. Not for anyone other than ME. the pictures I put up in this blog are to serve as a motivational reminder of where I once was and until I feel I have surpassed that fitness level I had once reached I won't be posting anymore pictures. I'm OK with that.

Today was day 2 of my P90X journey. Plyometrics. It wasn't easy, but I did it and made it through the whole workout. I need to pick it up though. I need to push harder. Tomorrow is another day, another workout and another chance to get closer to my goals.

FYI - I love Scooby-Doo and yes, those are Scooby boxers. Don't sweat my shit. lol

December 2nd - new accomplishment

Well, it has taken it's sweet @ss time, but I have FINALLY hit a mark under 190lbs. FINALLY. Still....losing at least 13lbs of FAT and at the same time transforming some of my existing fat into muscle over 4 months is a great accomplishment. I'm not where I want to be, but still headed in the right direction and it feels great.

Today's weight - 189.2 lbs.

Workout - P90X+ Kenpo Cardio + Ab Ripper 100. About 46 minutes of exercise in all.

Tomorrow is my last workout for the week and that will be P90 Level 3-4 (Disc 2). I'm gearing up for a change in my routine. I'm not sure what I am doing next. It is supposed to be P90X, but I may just do a hybrid workout with P90X and P90X+. Just because the workouts in P90X are an hour long (minimum!!). I really don't want to start getting up at 4:30AM, but it's looking more and more like that will be the case. Whatever. I still have a goal to achieve and I'm not there yet. I can ease up a little bit after I reach there and get to a comfortable maintenance level, but until I get there it's got to be FULL THROTTLE.

Wish me luck.

November 22 - Lifestyle Change

OK - well I'll tell you this. It has been quite an adventure the past 4 months with finding workouts that work for me, eating plans, etc... and I am not yet done. My fitness goals are not met yet. I am still enjoying the compliments I'm getting though from the changes I have made. So keep those coming! lol It doesn't inflate the ego, but it does keep me motivated.

Someone asked me the other day, so what is your next routine (P90X by the way) and how long will you do that? (90 days for starters!). Then they said something interesting... "well, at least after that you'll be done". Done with what? Getting up before 5AM to workout everyday? Being more careful of what I eat & drink? Nearly eliminating my soda & alcohol intake? Does that mean I'll be able to start snacking and watching TV after the kids go to bed (8PM) every night? NO.

That's when it occurred to me. What I HAVE CHOSEN is a lifestyle change. I CHOSE that I wanted to be healthier. Look better. Fit better into my clothes. Make healthier choices for me and my children. Be someone that my children can look up to and not be embarrassed of their over-weight, out of shape father.

What does that mean exactly??? It means I'm going to continue to get up and do something nearly every day to stay fit. It means I'm going to continue to be more selective about my food/drink choices. It is something that is going to have to continue for the rest of my life... hence the "lifestyle change".

Do I like to get up before 5AM to exercise? NOPE. Do I like to exercise at all? Not really. Do I like NOT snacking? Egh... yeah, sometimes actually. lol Do I miss ordering a ton of snacky/appetizer foods and sitting my fat ass on the couch and just watching TV all day? YES I DO. The problem with that though is that there were too many of those days and not enough better choices to off-set it. Some people ask me "Do you miss the 'Dew". I'm notorious for my love of Mountain Dew. Actually, I don't. I mean there are times where I just want a damn Mtn Dew and I have one. For the most part though, no - I don't and I do typically now just limit it to one. Is the greatest drink ever made to man Water? LOL Seriously? No. It's good for you, it has no calories and as long as it's cold I'll drink it, but it wouldn't be my favorite drink by a long shot. lol

What I do like (LOVE actually), is the way I feel after I workout. I love feeling the blood flowing through my body. The renewed energy in my mind & body. I feel so much more alert. I certainly have a lot more confidence. I'm not going to lie... I do like the "pumped up" look. lol Not to mention being looked at by your wife and reminded that not only does she still find you physically attractive, but you look even more attractive to her than when you first met! I like being able to help people, it is usually at the expense of time with my family, but I do sincerely like being part of a solution. A lot of the help I have provided for people in the past has been an extra set of hands for physical labor. Labor that would leave me exhausted and useless for the next day or even longer. I can't say that I really get that way now. I can go help someone for the day, bust my ass, work up a ridiculous sweat, be physically tired - but still have energy to play with my children before bed. Still have energy to complete my day before I go to bed and re-energize my body. The next day, yeah I might be a little sore, but I can still get up and do my exercise and still have plenty of energy for everything I want to do. To me, that is pretty awesome. Maybe because it is a feeling I haven't had in such a long time? Something I haven't had since I was a teenager, but I have it now and I love it.

So in short, if you are "choosing" to workout/exercise, whatever you want to call it. Ask yourself some tough questions. What is the point? Why are you doing this? When can you stop? Your answers may just tell you that you have chosen a lifestyle change, one that will hopefully give you the feeling of satisfaction & reward you for the rest of your life.

A little update on my progress by the way: I'm only down about 12 lbs (started at 202 and down to about 190). I've got a minimum of 15 lbs more to go. Ideally though I'd like to get to around 170 lbs (longer term). I used to force myself into size 36 waist jeans & dress clothes. EXTREMELY uncomfortable. In reality I should have been in 38s or 40s. I'm now comfortably fitting into 34s. I want to get back to my size 32s. Again, a longer term goal. I've all but stopped wearing XL shirts. They hang off me and don't fit very well. They certainly don't show the results of my efforts. It's nice to be back into size large shirts. I dont' anticipate going smaller there. That is one clothes item that will likely stay at it's current size. lol That and my socks. lol It's a tough journey. Being healthy is not something that comes natural when you have lived an unhealthier lifestyle for so long. It can be tough, but it is very rewarding.

Wish me luck over Thanksgiving because it is my most favorite food holiday of the year!! lol

November 14

No idea what my exact weight is right now. I can say I weighed myself on Sunday (after a big night out with the wife on Saturday) and it wasn't good. I was up a solid 3 lbs. Serves me right. Time to get my ass back on track. I've got even more ground to reclaim now to get under 190. UGH. Work hard and shoot myself in the foot. That seems to be my motto. lol

Had a good workout this morning though and looking for another tomorrow. We'll go from there.

November 5 - weigh in

Weighed in this morning after everyone got up. With my shirt and glasses on 192.6 lbs. Without them on, 191.8 lbs. That is how I typically weigh myself (just in my boxers) so I'm sticking with the lower number. Psyched I have finally lost that first 10 lbs. The eating right is such a HUGE deal. I can't believe it.